oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
You left your underwear on the fireplace
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
