i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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