he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Green mimosas i think yes
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Randomize
