we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
kristin has been a bad kristin
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
FUCK WHALES
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
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