Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize
