I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize