Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
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