Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Randomize
