Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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