dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I'm sobbing to NWA
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