so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
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