She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
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