I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Randomize