he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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