Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
Randomize
