The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Randomize
