it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...