I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Randomize
