Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
