Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
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