therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize
