So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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