my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
