maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Randomize
