so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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