New invention idea: vibrating tampons
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
