so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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