I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
