when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Randomize