Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
