it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
I pour the whiskey from now on
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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