Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Your penis caused this!
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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