i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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