pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
I got inside last night via doggy door
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
