There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
Randomize
