Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
There is a strange man mowing my lawn. Best day ever.
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Randomize