Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(248): View more from Michigan

It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.

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(250): View more from British Columbia

Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.

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(415): View more from California

well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart

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(224): View more from Illinois

You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.

(630): View more from Illinois

Thats like the definition of a good friend

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(313): View more from Michigan

She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.

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(502): View more from Kentucky

We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart

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(316): View more from Kansas

There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.

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(785): View more from Kansas

I round house kicked her emotions in the face

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(919): View more from North Carolina

TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.

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