successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
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