Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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