I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
Randomize