the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
