I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Randomize
