You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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