dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize