My room smells like vodka and shame
I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
