the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
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