i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
