ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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