remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
We had to coat check the pizza.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Randomize