So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
