im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Randomize
