So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Randomize
